Voices tell a Story 4.Snow Kagome and the 7 Chibi Cross dressers.(Otherwise known as Next time, we think up a plot first)Typed by Icka! M. Chif *Auto walks up and taps Icka! on the shoulder.* Auto: We took a vote... Icka! *si~igh*: Lemme guess... time for another story? Auto: We want Naraku in drag. Icka! *caught totally off guard*: Wha-? Auto: Preferably pink chiffon. And pearls. *Icka! falls down anime style* Icka!: Okay... that's it. No more Slayers fics for you. Morals *pops up* And duct tape. We want duct tape. Icka!: Duct tape? Morals: Yup. Icka!: I never took you for a pervert, Morals. Morals: What's so perverted about duct tape? It's useful for everything! Fix holes, hold stuff together- Imp: Cheese Whizzzzzzzzz!!! Morals:-Gags for annoying siblings. Icka!: We already knew you were a pervert, Imp. Evil: Quite. *Whiffles Imp and sticks it in a barrel. Morals duct tapes it shut.* Auto: Thank you. Evil: I didn't do it for you. Icka!: Okay, so do you have a plot for all this? Morals: ... Evil: ... Auto: ... Imp *from in the barrel*: Cheese Whizzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!!! Icka! *Sigh*: Okay, fine. Come up with a plot idea and I'll type it up. *The next morning* Auto: Okay, start up the computer. We know what we're going to tell. Icka!: I know. *ya~wn* Next time, could you not do your plotting session while I'm trying to fall asleep? I do have work to be a wake for. Sorta. Evil: What ever. We're telling the story of Snow Kagome and the 7 Chibi Cross Dressers. Icka! *takes a second to process this, she's not quite awake*: I'm scared. Evil: Once upon a time, there lived a cute little teenager by the name of Snow Kagome. She had hair as black as darkness, lips the colour of freshly drawn blood, eyes the colour of a finely wrought steel blade and skin as pale as clouds crossing the full moon at midnight. Morals: That's it. You're never describing anything again, you Goth. Evil *muttering*: So I like knives. Auto: Snow Kagome's father had disappeared years before leaving her mother and grandfather to raise her. One day, she went looking for her cat at the family well and accidentally fell in. Imp *still in the barrel*: Cheese Whizzzzzzz!!! Evil: We should have duct taped it's mouth as well as the barrel. Morals: Oh, well. Hindsight. So when Snow Kagome pulled herself out of the well, she discovered she was in a different place and time. Curious, she wandered around, attracting the attention of the ruler of the kingdom, Queen Kikyo. Auto: I thought we were trying to avoid her. Morals: Well... it works. Queen Kikyo saw Snow Kagome and was instantly jealous. Here was her mirror image, only more animated. So she sent out several bug youkai to dispose of her. Kagome *dryly*: Thanks. Evil *cheerfully*: Anytime! Auto: The bug youkai chased Snow Kagome deep into the forest. They were just closing in on her to take her soul when she noticed a cottage in a clearing. Taking a gamble, she ran for it and managed to make it inside, slamming the door after her. Imp: Bam! Hahahahahaa! Icka!: I want whatever it's had. And give me a double. Evil: You really aren't awake, are you? Icka!: No..? Evil: With the bug youkai circling the cabin, Snow Kagome was trapped inside. She wandered around for a bit and realised the place was a mess. So, not having anything better to do, she cleaned it up a bit and made some ramen, which she'd conveniently been carrying in her pack. Kagome: So, I was chasing my cat in our shrine and just happened to have my pack on? Morals: Just play along, just play along... Auto: After which, she curled up in a chair and took a nap. Morals: Wait... this is a bachelor place. You're really expecting to find clean place chair for her rest in? *Voices glance around Icka!'s place.* Auto: You have a point. Icka!: Hey! Morals: What about the beanbags? Evil: Easy enough to clean off. Kagome: And they're comfortable. *brushes one off, curls up and falls asleep.* Morals: How cute... Evil: Always knew you were a softie, Morals. Auto: Unbeknown to Snow Kagome, the owners of the cottage were not far away, and were rapidly approaching. Inuyasha: I'm not singing the @$#^$&*! song! Shippou: Aw, c'mon! It's fun! Inuyasha: No &#$^%!$ way. Shippou: I'll teach you the hand movements. Inuyasha: I told you, no ^&#%^&#%&$@ way! Shippou: Even Naraku can do it! See, just do what I do! *begins singing* You put your right arm in, you take your right arm out- *Inuyasha bops Shippou, causing the kit to freeze half way through the motions for the Hokey Pokey* Sesshou-maru: I do not like this song. Jaken: Why not, O' Sesshou-maru sama? Sesshou-maru: I do not have a right arm to put in. Evil *smirking*: Or a left one, depending on if it's the manga or the graphic novel. Auto: So, anyway. The occupants of the cottage got to their house and found that it had been straighten up and that there was actual cooked non-meat food there. Kouga: What's wrong with raw boar? Morals: If you have to ask... Auto: Curious who would have done such a thing to their residence, the men split up to find out to see if anything else had been disturbed. Naraku *spotting Kagome*: Ku ku ku, I have you now... *Laughter not being very subtle, it attracts the attention of the others, who also spot Kagome asleep on the beanbag.* Kouga: MINE! *glomps Kagome* Kagome *rudely woken up*: Kyaa!! Morals: Enter scream and bash reflex... *Inuyasha knocks Kouga off of Kagome with a well placed fist.* Morals *sweatdropping*: Not quite the bash I was thinking, but it works... Kagome: That's getting old... Inuyasha: You're @#$^@%&@ telling me. *Kagome looks at the guys and realises that something not quite right* Kagome *claps hands excitedly*: Oh! You must be the Sailor Scouts! *Picks up Shippou* And you're Chibi Usa! Shippou *angrily*: I am not Chibi Usa! Kagome: Then why are you in a fuku? Jaken *jumps up and strikes a pose*: We are the 7 Cross dressing Chibis! Kagome *turning slightly greenish/red as she looks away*: Ano... You might want a longer skirt if you're going to pose from high places... Jaken: Eep! *pushes his skirt down* Icka!: This is precisely why I don't wear short skirts. Imp: What?! What?! I can't see! Evil: Good. You're too young. Imp: Older than you! Auto: It was that moment that Snow Kagome noticed that all the guys around her were dressed in fukus. Very nice ones at that. And they were shorter and cuter than normal. Inuyasha: Maybe we should @%^*$ call her 'Slow' Kagome if she's just now noticing. Kagome *raising an eyebrow at him.*: Nice legs. Inuyasha *blushing*: @#$*&*(&**(!%$#~%#^*()%$#@~$#@^*()Q$#@!!!! Kagome: So, um... why are you all dressed in fukus? Sesshou-maru: Plot device. Auto: Because it is funny. This is MY story, dangit! Imp: Cheese Whizzzzzz!!!!! Shippou: Lets just say they blackmailed us, okay? Kagome: With what? *The only sounds heard is Imp rocking the duct taped barrel.* Kagome: On second thought, I don't want to know... Morals: It's probably best that way. Kagome: So, um... do I get to guess which Scout, urm, dwarf you guys are? Inuyasha: This isn't @%$^*$ Disney. Shippou *counting on his fingers*: We're Cursing, Kid, Cutie, Crummy, Killer, Kouga and... *looks over at the person hiding in the background, trying not to get noticed* What was your name again? Hojo: Embarrassed... Kagome *blink*: Hojo? *Hojo turns red as Kagome giggles* Kagome *hugging Shippou*: Let me guess, you're Cutie! Shippou *sulks*: No, I'm Kid. Evil *draping herself over Sesshou-maru*: HE'S Cutie. I named him. *Morals rolls eyes off to the side* Evil: We could do BSSG, Morals. *JR screams and runs away in a panic* Icka! *calls after him*: Gomen, JR! Morals: We are NOT doing Bishoujo Sailor Senshi Ghostbusters! These are youkai! -Except for Hojo... Could we please get back to the story? Auto: Fine. Since they couldn't just turn her out- Naraku: Sure we could. Evil: Now you know why we named you Killer. Auto: -The 7 Cross dressing Chibis invited Snow Kagome to stay, and to make ramen. Kouga: MINE! *glomps Kagome* You're not leaving. Auto: Or it could have happened that way... Inuyasha: !$#@%$#@&^*%$@!$! *knocks Kouga off Kagome. Again.* Is the rest of the !#$%%#$^ story going to go like this?! Morals: Probably. Imp: Cheese Whizzzzz!!!! Auto: Well, back to the Queen- Evil *innocently*: Which one? Auto *blinks, taken back*: Uh... The evil one... *Sesshou-maru and Naraku look at each other.* Jaken: Which one again? Auto: Forget the Queen, back to Kikyo! Hojo: If we're forgetting the queens, does that mean we can get out of these Fukus? Auto: No. Anyway. Do some plot hole that you could drive a large oni through, Kikyo discovered that Snow Kagome was still alive and well. So she disguised herself as an old one-eyed woman to take care of Kagome permanently. Shippou: Does that mean Kagome's going back to her time? Kikyo: No, that means I'm tricking her into eating some poisoned Cheese Whiz while the Cross dressers are away. Kagome: Ha! That's not going to work because now I know what you're going to do! Inuyasha: And now we're not going to leave. Kouga: Yeah! *Glomps Kagome* MINE! Kagome: Kyaaa! *bashes Kouga over the head, making him release her.* Morals *pleased*: THAT'S what I mean by the 'Scream and Bash Reflex'. Auto: And she has to poison Snow Kagome, that's the way the plot goes. Shippou: We have a plot? Evil: Not often, but occasionally. Icka!: Shhh! You're not supposed to let them know that! Evil: Oh, right. Sorry. Auto: So anyway, Kikyo poisoned them by slipping the Cheese Whiz- Imp: Cheese Whizzzzzzzz!!!!!!!!!!! Auto:-Into their ramen that night. The youkai, having stronger stomachs than humans were unaffected, but Snow Kagome croaked on the spot. Kagome: Yippiee!!! Shippou: You're happy to be dead? Kagome: Gets me out of the fic! Auto *deadpans*: No. Kagome *crestfallen*: Dang it. *Hojo makes a choking sound and falls over as well.* Shippou: He died of embarrassment! Morals: No, Embarrassed just died. Shippou: There's a difference? Morals: Point. Auto: Oops. Forgot he was human... Imp: Way to go, 'Miss Narrator'. Auto: Like your story made so much more sense. Imp: At least no one died in mine. Cheese Whizzzzzzzzz!!!!! Auto: Oh, shut up! It's a plot hole! Embarrassed isn't dead! Imp: Is too. Auto: Is not. Imp: Is too. Auto: Is not. Imp: Too. Auto: Not! Icka!: CHILDREN! Imp: Older than you... Icka!: Gah! Story? Auto: Right. So, the SEVEN Chibi Cross dressers decided to make a coffin for her out of the main thing lying around the house. Evil: Pink Chiffon? Auto: Duct tape. They are 7 guys after all. Morals: Yeah! *Stands tall and manly. Evil bites her tongue.* Auto: However, it was in designer colours. Icka!: Yeah! Morals: Aren't you forgetting something? Auto: Like what? Morals: A Prince-? Auto *blink*: Prince? Morals: To wake up Snow Kagome...? Auto: I... forgot... Kagome: So, what exactly did I die for? Kikyo: Yes! I RULE! *does a little dance* *Imp laughs so hard it tips the barrel over. The bottom pops off, freeing Imp.* Imp *flashes the victory sign*: Yes! I'm BACK! Evil *dryly*: You forgot to tape the bottom, Morals. Morals: Oops. Icka!: Well, this plot's gone to rot. Good job guys. Auto: We got the Cross dressing, the Duct Tape and the Cheese Whiz in it. Doesn't that count as an ending? Inuyasha Cast: No. *The 7 Chibi Cross dressers look ready to maim the Voices.* Icka!: Sheesh. I'm going to go write EGB for a while. Come back when you can finish this... *Walks off* *Next morning. Again.* Icka! *not awake*: I'm gonna kill you... as soon as the world stops moving. Imp *intently*: Wot? Icka!: A plotting session at midnight is not what I meant by finishing the story. Evil: So? We got it done. Icka! *sigh*: Alright. Fine. But after this, we update the website. Morals: Sounds like a deal. Auto: Okay, we got it now. So the 7 Chibi Cross dressers put Snow Kagome into the designer coloured duct tape coffin when suddenly one of the chibis- Kouga: MINE!!! *Glomps Kagome* Auto: Only this time, he squeezed her so tight that it forced the poisoned Cheese Whiz out the way it came, bringing her back to life. Imp: You mean-? Auto *nods*: She up chucked the whole thing. Kagome: I'm not sure if I should be happy or not... Kouga: YES!!! I told you she was mine! I am the PRINCE!!! Shippou: No... you're still a queen... Inuyasha: She's MINE! *Punts Kouga into the stratosphere.* *All stare blankly at Inuyasha* Inuyasha *turning red and putting an arm behind his head, embarrassed* Sorry... It was getting old. Auto: So Snow Kagome lived happily ever after with the 7, uh... 6 Cross dressing Chibis. Naraku: Ku ku ku... Sesshou-maru: Give me our father's fang and I'll forget this incident ever happened. Inuyasha: !#@&*%&%@!$#&*$&%()&*()&%$@!^$#&*(!!!! Imp: Now you know why we named you Cursing. Hojo: I think I'm late for school... Shippou: And you call THIS 'Happily Ever After'?! Morals: Wait... what happened to Queen Kikyo? Auto: She ate the poisoned Cheese Whiz by accident. *Evil snickers* Morals: Oh. Kagome: It's really kind of sad... some of them have better legs than I do... Fin. One of the running jokes in the Ghostbuster Commutinity is the BSSG, where the Real Ghostbusters get dressed up as Sailor Scouts. (Scary, isn't it?) One of my favourite people on line, JR Dyer, is one of the few guys willing to go into a chat room with a bunch of crazy females to talk GB. Unfortunately for him, this means he often gets dressed up in a fuku by said crazed females. (For the record, I never got him into a fuku. But I did trick him into dressing like Jessie from Team Rocket once!) One of the side effects of this is that Fukus, BSSG and JR screaming and running in a panic are now forever linked in our minds. Gomen, JR. |
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