The story that started this, by Anneke

"Where you going?" asked Inu-yasha.

"To the well and back to my home." replied Kagome.

"What's in the back pack?" he asked her.

"Some snacks for my family." she explained.

Inu-yasha nodded and let her walk on her way. Luckily she was distracted by Shippo, and Inu-yasha made it to the well first without being seen. He had an idea this time. He slipped into the well and out again.

He made his way to the house...

Kagome was glad to return home. "I'm home. I brought snacks." she stated simply.

<cough cough> "In here." called a voice.

Kagome entered to see a person bundled in blankets on a bed. "You don't look well, are you okay?"

Inu-yasha pulled back the covers of the bed. With a big grin.

"Grandma, what big ears you have." giggled Kagome.

"What are you talking about, your coming back right now."

"Grandma, what big eyes you have." continued Kagome.

Inu-yasha rolled his eyes. "Yeah, and what big teeth I have to." He snarled at her.

Kagome burst into total giggles. "I didn't know you knew the story."

The End.

Story Time

By Icka! M. Chif

Disclaimer: All characters belong to Rumiko Takahashi, the idea was planted in my head by Anneke and the voices ran with it. I just typed it.

Note: Shippou may seem a bit out of character, but I'm going on the theory that he really is older than he looks, and a deamon to boot, so is a bit more 'worldly wise' than Kagome.

"What's this, Kagome-chan?" Shippou asked, crawling over her shoulder to look at the book she was studying.

She glanced over at him and smiled at him. He was so cute. "I'm studying English. This is a book of Fairey Tales."

Shippou glanced between his own fluffy tail and the picture in the book with a slight frown. "They don't have tails." He pointed out, leaning over and tapping the person in the picture.

"No, I mean tales as in stories." She explained. "It's a book of stories in a different language."

Shippou brightened. Stories he knew about, they were great fun. "Can you tell me one?" He asked, sliding into her lap, between her and the book.

Kagome sighed. She really should be studying harder on this... but he was looking at her with those big innocent eyes... "Okay, maybe it'll help me study." She finally agreed.

Shippou grinned, relaxing against her. "Great!" Around her, she noticed Miroku move closer slightly, as if to hear the story better. She couldn't see Inuyasha in the tree above her, but she could bet he was listening too.

"Alright, this is called 'Little Red Riding Hood'." Before they could ask what that meant, she quickly added "A red riding hood is a kind of cloak, with a hood. I guess they used to wear them back then."

Shippou and Miroku nodded and she continued the story. "So, one day Little Red Riding Hood's mother asked Little Red Riding Hood-"

Shippou cut her off. "Does she have a name besides the hood she wears?" He asked.

She thought about it. He did have a good point. "Nope. That's what they keep calling her."

The kitsune frowned. "Let's call her Kagome then. Easier to remember."

Miroku smiled from his seat, evidently agreeing with the kit. "We'll call her Kagome then." She agreed. Why not? "Well, one day Lit- Kagome's mother asked her to deliver a basket of snacks to her grandmother-"

"Lady Kaede?!" Shippou interjected. Kagome paused. That would make sense coming from Shippou, Lady Kaede was like a grandmother figure to him in many aspects.

"-To Lady Kaede." she concluded. Shippou grinned, his smile almost going from ear to ear. "Now be careful in the woods, Kagome's mother warned. There's lots of evil creatures in the forest."

At that, Shippou-chan tilted his head back to looked up at Inuyasha pointedly. "Yeah."

Kagome looked up at the youkai in the tree. Inuyasha glared down at them. "Stuff it."

Shippou snickered and leaned against Kagome again. "Continue?" He asked sweetly. She mentally sighed.

"Lit- Kagome agreed with her mother, put on her little red hood and went out into the forest to deliver the basket to Lady Kaede. Now, as she was walking down the path to Lady Kaede's house, she ran into a wolf."

"Wolf youkai?" Shippou inquired, interrupting once more.

Kagome sighed again. It was going to be one of those stories... "Fine, yes. A Dog-youkai named Inuyasha."

"Hey!" She glanced up to see Inuyasha looking down at them, an angry expression on his face. "What the hell am I doing in your story?"

She looked up at him innocently. "Being the villain, evidently."

"WHAT?!"

Both Shippou and Morioka snickered. "Please, continue Kagome-sama." Miroku requested. Inuyasha growled wordlessly above her.

"Right." She agreed. "'Where are you going, neesan?' he asked Kagome. 'I'm going to Lady Kaede's house, who lives at the end of the path.' She replied. 'To bring her a basket of snacks.'"

"Kagome no baka." Inuyasha muttered. Kagome paused, wondering on if he meant her or the Kagome in the story for a second. She decided it was the character, he usually used stronger language when referring to her. And he had a point, it was pretty stupid of Little Red Riding Hood to just tell this stranger where she was going.

"Right. Well, the wolf-"

"Inuyasha." Shippou prompted.

"Hai. Well, Inuyasha bid Kagome good-day and cut through the forest to reach Lady Kaede's house while Kagome dawdled and collected flowers along the path's edges."

Inuyasha snorted again, muttering about that sounded about right. She ignored him.

"Inuyasha beat Kagome to Lady Kaede's house and-" Kagome paused. She couldn't say that Inuyasha ate Lady Kaede, even if that's how the story went. She decided to bluff it. "-Found that Lady Kaede was out for the day, helping at a nearby village. So Inuyasha snuck into the cottage and put on her shawl and hat, disguising himself as Lady Kaede."

Miroku and Shippou-chan had a good snicker over that. She looked up apologetically at Inuyasha. "Sorry. That's how the story goes."

"Why do I have to be the villain?" He demanded.

"Cuz you're the wolf youkai." Shippou answered primly.

"And I'm much too good looking to be the villain." Miroku smirked, just to get Inuyasha's goat. It worked.

"Oh, That's open to debate." Inuyasha growled, jumping out of the tree and landing beside her. "Had any mirrors break lately?"

She cleared her throat, stopping them before it got too far. "Anyway, Lit- Kagome finally made it to Lady Kaede's house and knocked on the door. 'Who is it?' Inuyasha called, pitching his voice up to try and sound like Lady Kaede's."

This sent Miroku and Shippou into snickers again. Inuyasha growled low in his throat. This story was seriously starting to piss him off.

"'It's me, Grandmother.' Kagome called back. The wo- er, Inuyasha pulled the covers up to his chin and invited her in."

"Moron." Inuyasha snorted.

Shippou-chan nodded. "The voice would be different. And the scent."

"Humans can't smell that, Shippou-Chan." Miroku reminded him.

"Oh, yeah." Shippou nodded. He knew that. "What happened next?"

"She went inside." Kagome replied, bracing herself for their reactions. Sure enough, all 3 guys rolled their eyes. She sighed. "Kagome walked over to the bed to give who she thought was Lady Kaede the basket of goodies. As she did, she noticed that Lady Kaede didn't look quite right."

"Duh." Shippou muttered. Miroku snickered.

"'Why, Grand- Lady Kaede, what big eyes you have.' Kagome said, stepping closer to the bed. 'The better to see you with, my dear.' Inuyasha replied."

The real Inuyasha snorted at 'my dear'.

"Kagome took a step closer to the bed. 'And Lady Kaede, what big ears you have.'" Kagome had a bit of trouble keeping a straight face at that, especially with Inuyasha glaring at her like he wanted to tear her head off.

"'The better to hear you with, my dear.' Inuyasha replied, as Kagome took a step closer. 'and Lady Kaede, what big teeth you have!' Kagome remarked, now at the bed side. The wol- Inuyasha threw the covers off and grabbed Kagome. 'The better to eat you with!'"

Inuyasha let out a strangled sound, making her pause to glance over. He looked like he'd just eaten something incredibly sour.

"The better to eat you with?" Miroku echoed. He looked over at the half youkai. "And just how many times have you tried to *eat* Kagome-sama?" He inquired, a bit of a smirk tugging on the end of his lips.

"Shaddup, ya yiffin' pervert!" Inuyasha roared at him.

Shippou let out a delighted giggle, watching Inuyasha turn an interesting shade of pink from the safety of Kagome's arms.

"What's so funny?" She inquired, totally confused. Youkai could be so strange sometimes...

"Nothing." Inuyasha choked out. "Just finished your story."

Kagome shrugged. "Well, the wo- uh, Inuyasha does just that. He gobbles her up. The end."

Miroku nearly bust a gut laughing as Shippou fell out of her lap, laughing so hard he was almost crying. Puzzled, Kagome looked over at Inuyasha. His face was a darker shade of red then his cloak, and he looked about ready to have something in his head explode.

"What are you so mad about?" She asked. "You won in the end."

That only sent Shippou and Miroku off even harder peals of laughter.

"THAT WAS NOT ME!!!" Inuyasha roared, standing up. He turned and stalked off, letting out a stream of curses that would've melted rocks if they had ears.

Kagome looked at Shippou and Miroku, who seemed to be calming down some. "What was that about?"

"Na-nothing." Miroku assured her, wiping his eyes with his sleeve as his shoulders shook. "Do not let it concern you, Kagome-sama. You'll understand later."

"Kagome-chan?" Shippou asked, distracting her from that strange comment by tugging on her sleeve as he looked up at her with big innocent blue eyes. "Can you tell us another story?"

She sighed. "Maybe later. I've still got a bunch of studying to do."

"Promise?" Shippou pressed. "I like these 'Fairey Tales'."

"Promise." She agreed.

"Okay." Shippou hopped out of her lap, apparently pleased with the promise.

She sighed again and picked up her text books once more as Miroku began work on their evening meal.

What could be so funny about a person being eaten?

Fin.

Okay, I know that there's a couple of other endings I could have used for 'Little Red Riding Hood'. There's the 'happy' ending, where a woodsman comes and cuts open the wolf (or blasts his head off) and saves Red Riding and her Grandmother. Even thought about casting Shippou-chan as him for a bit. There's the older, lesser known ending as well, where the Wolf tricks Red into eating various parts of Grandmother, then asks Red to get into bed with him 'to keep him warm'. Then he either devours her, or she tricks him by saying she has to go to the bathroom and leaves, getting home safely.

The morals are the same. Don't talk to strangers, and don't stray off the path.

Also, in the original French version, the last bit about her getting eaten was a play on words for the adults to snicker over while the kids were frightened over the main character getting killed.

Gotta love Fairey Tales. : } They just get funnier the older you get.

Comments, questions and other fun twisted fairey tales, please send to icka_IMP@hotmail.com