Inu-Gumi at Splash Mountain.

By Icka! M. Chif

"I don't wanna go!"

"Shippou, you can't change your mind now that we're at the front of the line. We have to go on."

"But.. but... It has..."

"Feh. Who ever heard of a youkai afraid of Splash Mountain?"

"And who was the one who tried to attack the Pirates during the 'Pirates of the Caribbean' ride, Hmmmmm Inuyasha?"

"Well, SOMEBODY could have told us that they weren't real before the ride started!"

"It's called a RIDE for a reason!"

"Uh... How many members in your party, sir?"

"Ku ku ku."

"Right. Number 1, please."

"They put the man wearing the large white baboon skin in the front of the log ride..."

"I'm sitting as far away from that as I can."

"For once you and I are in agreement, Miroku. Can I sit with you?"

"... uh, okay Sango."

"I can't believe I just heard that."

"How many members in your group, Miss?"

"... Three."

"Number 4, please."

"Yeah! Rin gets to sit up front!"

"You're not getting me wet, runt!"

"Tee-hee!"

"Uh, Inuyasha? Did the attendant just call Sesshou-maru 'Miss'?"

*snicker*

"Yeah."

"How many members in your party, Miss? Oh, Happy Birthday! Kikyo, is it?"

"Um.. yes."

"Well, Happy Birthday!!!"

"Thank you. It's, it's just me."

"Alright. Number 5 please."

"She can sit with me, Ku ku ku"

"Uh..."

"Alright. If you'll take a seat right behind him-"

"Uh, right..."

"And how many in your party?"

"Five."

"I don't wanna go!"

"You'll thank us later."

"No I won't!"

"If you'll take these seats here..."

"Sango and I can take the back section, you three can take the middle."

"Alright."

"NOoooooo!"

"Quiet, Shippou."

"I'll take the back. I want you in front of me, Monk."

"I'm hurt, Sango. Don't you trust me?"

"Only when I know where your hands are."

"I'll get up front, you hold on to Shippou, Kagome."

"With the way he's attached to your cloak, I don't see an option."

"Nononononononono..."

"Relax, Shippou. It'll be alright."

*ka-chunk!*

*splush!*

"See? And away we go!"

"I'm gonna be sick...."

"Hey, look! There's a house up there!"

"...and there's a drop up ahead."

"Ku ku ku"

"AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

"KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!"

"NNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOONONONONONONONO!!!"

*SPLASH!!*

"See? That wasn't so bad."

"Ack.. Sango... you can let go of me..."

"Oh. Sorry."

"No *gasp, wheeze* Problem..."

"Nice view up here."

"Hey, look! There's another house! 'Ber Bear'"

"Who's he?"

"... and another drop."

"Ku ku ku"

"AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

"KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!"

"WWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

*SPLASH!*

"I think Shippou is now a permanent fixture in your cloak, Inuyasha."

"Grrrrrrrrr"

"What's this?"

"They're... singing..."

"Hey look! A bunny rabbit!"

"What is 'Zippy Doo Dah'?"

"Um... I think it's a made up word."

"That bear is tied up with his ankles at his knees. And he's smiling."

"Should we help him?"

"It's a ride, he's okay. Just sit back down-"

*whump!*

"!@$%%&#!#$^%$&%&*&@%!&**)*()&*$@~#@!%#%$!!!"

"Sorry Inuyasha... Sorry Kikyo..."

"S'okay."

"!#$%&%$!!"

"Um, there are children here. That's not the most appropriate language to be using, Inuyasha."

"You can !#$%&%^&#!, Monk!"

"Hey, look! There's the rabbit!"

"Good distractionary tactic."

"Thank you."

"...And there's another drop."

"Wwwwaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!!!"

"Brace for impact!!!"

*whooosh!*

*splish*

"That was lame."

"No one got wet. It's a miracle!!!"

"Oooh, psychotic glow-in-the-dark bees!"

"Ku ku ku"

"And they're singing!"

"I'm starting to wonder about him..."

"No kidding."

"Hey look! The rabbit got caught! Bwhahahahaha!!!"

"It's not polite to laugh at someone else's misfortune."

"Ku ku ku"

"Okay, he's allowed to laugh, that's his job, he's the bad guy."

"I think he's getting ideas."

"Never mind, that's bad."

"Aww, they're all crying...."

"The baby opossums look happy."

"They're too young to know better."

"Waaaaaahhhhhhhh!!!"

"Shippou isn't."

"He just saw the lift to the top of Splash Mountain."

"I wanna get offffff!!!"

"Are those vultures mocking us?"

"What is a 'laughing place'?"

"I have killed vultures for less."

"It's their job, that's what they do."

"Oh, yes. An entire large city filled with tiny mocking non-people."

"Tiny mocking SINGING non-people. Don't they ever STOP?"

"No."

"It's their job."

"That's MY line!"

"Let me out! Let me out! Let me out!!!"

"No, that's hell. Could it get any worse?"

*ka-CHUNK!*

*rrrr-rrrr-rrrr-rrrr-rrrr*

"You had to ask."

"We're going up!"

"I wanna get off! Make it stop!!!"

"Uh... I'm starting to agree with Shippou..."

"Ku ku ku"

"Too late! We're at the top!"

"Whoa. Nice view."

"There's thorns at the bottom..."

"WE'RE GONNA DIE!!!"

"BIG thorns..."

"Ku ku ku"

"SHOVE IT NARAKUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!"

"KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

"WWWWAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!"

"WWWWWHHHHOOOOAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!""

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!"

*SPLASH!!!*

"We're alive."

*gasp!*

"WE'RE ALIVE!!! WHOOOOO!!!"

"Sango... let go... please..."

"WHOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

"I think we killed Shippou..."

"We may have a problem."

"Can't breathe..."

"The entire front of the boat got soaked."

"So? It's a water ride! You're supposed to get wet!"

"Naraku's up there."

"Ku ku ku"

*snif*

"What's that smell?"

"... air..."

"Eww!!! Wet Baboon skin!!!"

"I think I'm going to barf..."

"Not on the boat."

"We're almost out, there's the picture of us on the way down!"

"Shippou looks green."

"Shippou is green."

"Why is Miroku blue?"

"He's not blue in the picture."

"No, I mean right now. He's blue."

"Eep! Sorry Miroku!!!"

*GASP!*

"Air..."

"Good one, Sango. He's not even groping you and you're trying to kill him."

*Blush*

"Get me out of here, I'm gonna die from the stench!!!"

"Welcome back. Enjoy your trip?"

"Yes!"

"No!"

"I'm outta here!"

"Where are we going next?"

"I wanna go on the Matterhorn!"

"Let's do it again!"

"Let's not."

"Anywhere away from Naraku and his stink!"

"Haunted House!"

"Kikyo! You're soaked!"

"Big Thunder Mountain!"

"We're going shopping first."

"Why do we have to go shopping?!"

"To get Kikyo a souvenir t-shirt."

"Why?"

*beat*

"Ohhhhh..."

*blush*

"Bwhahahahahaha!!!"

"Inuyasha! It's not polite to laugh!"

"Not that! Lookit Sesshou-maru and Jaken!! They're SOAKED!!! Bwhahahahahaa!!"

"Rin wants to do it again!"

"No!!!"

"I think the Teacups are in order now."

*snicker*

"Shove it, 'brother'."

"With the way his kimono is sticking to Sesshou-maru, I think they're going to be selling lots of souvenir t-shirts today..."

Fin.